Alvin and the Chipmunks 2: The Squeakquel (u)

Betty Thomas (88 mins), voices of Justin Long, Anna Faris, Jason Lee, Christina Applegate

I hardly know where to begin with this – the "squeakquel" bit alone made me shudder.

Three digimated rodents play guitar, go to school and create merry hell, all for the benefit of the "holiday season" audiences that made the original Chipmunks movie a "global phenomenon" to the tune of £350m. That's not phenomenal – that's criminal.

'Alvin and the Chipmunks 2: The Squeakquel' is released 21 December nationwide