Larry David pens essay revealing why he ‘detests’ Christmas

‘I’m a creature of habit and can’t tolerate anything that throws me off my normal routine’

Larry David has penned a humorous essay detailing why he abhors Christmas.

The piece, titled “A Very Larry David Christmas”, was published in a recent issue of Air Mail, a digital newsletter launched in 2019 by former Vanity Fair editor Graydon Carter and former New York Times journalist Alessandra Stanley.

David described himself as being “filled with dread at the prospect of close social encounters with what seemed like hundreds of relatives” ahead of Christmastime.

“I’m a creature of habit and can’t tolerate anything that throws me off my normal routine. That’s why I detest all holidays, but none as much as Christmas,” he wrote.

The comedian called Christmas music “loathsome” and took Christmas films to task for “their ridiculous, treacly sentiments”.

He also criticised “the presents – thinking about them, shopping for them (never without resentment), and the attendant pile of garbage that accumulates from opening them, an environmental disaster simultaneously taking place in living rooms across the country”.

David recounted spending a blissful Christmas by himself, enjoying Chinese food at a local restaurant.

“Since then, eating Chinese food by myself on Christmas Day has become a cherished yearly ritual, which I look forward to like the ending of construction on the house next door,” he added.

Seinfeld, the sitcom co-created by David and Jerry Seinfeld, famously has an episode dedicated to the secular holiday Festivus, designed for those who want an alternative to Christmas.